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IWSG – Security

  • Posted on June 3, 2015 at 8:09 pm

Security is a tricky thing. Some spend their entire lives chasing after it. Some are born with it, and retain it until the day they die. You can lose it, and you can gain it, as easily as the wind blows. There are a thousand factors to whether or not your are secure. Locks can help, or hinder, while hard work seems to attract and also abolish.

What I’m talking about is a complex thing. Something that everyone, I think, in their own way searches and yearns for. For some, Security can be a good paycheck and knowing where their next meal comes from. For others, Security can be the next road they intend to walk down, or the next turn on a map. For a few, security can be the end of a leash in another’s hands. For others, security is holding that leash, and knowing they could let go at any time.

It takes a long time to be able to determine what security is for ourselves. And once we do, we hold on to that definition, even after it becomes old, outdated, and chipped away. Human beings don’t enjoy change. We try to, we try to look at the bright side, and sometimes we fail. Sometimes, we push ourselves away from good change, cathartic change, in an attempt to force ourselves into a ‘security’ that no longer fits. False Security.

It takes work to define what Security means to you. It takes trying new things. It takes holding your own against those who would take your security away from you. There are steps that you can take to find and keep it. There are steps you can take to lose and break away from it. There is good security, and there is bad security.

But when security is found, when you really have it, it’s like the whole world is built just for you. You can be happy with what you have. You can set your sights on everything you don’t. You can tune out all those niggling worries, and focus on what is truly important. Security, beyond anything else, is what I crave most in my life. It’d be easier, of course, if Security weren’t as flowing as a river, and as flickering as a flame. But then, the journey for it wouldn’t be near as fun, would it?

So feel insecure. Feel downtrodden, and worry. All of that is work, towards the one thing you need above all else. Insecurity IS your security. Because you just have to let security in, to end insecurity.

Finding Your Niche in 3 Easy Steps

  • Posted on July 15, 2014 at 10:45 pm

For some of us, the word Niche ends up being a scary sort of thing. Something to fear and worry over. It becomes something akin to the word ‘cage’ or ‘trap’. We feel as though it is meant to hem in what we want to accomplish with the world. It isn’t something that comes easy or is to be taken lightly, and that, in and of itself, brings about a form of terror. Niche writing tends to end up very personal, and some don’t wish to be subjected to the backlash that writing a blog on ‘personal care after BDSM‘ or ‘how to trim your pubic hairs‘, but that is what they know, and love.
When it came to my attention that perhaps finding that one little niche market that meant something to me would be a good idea, I legitimately had a panic attack for several days. I didn’t want to be hemmed into something that didn’t fit. But how could I find something that did? What if it was too much for my readers to ever want to read? What if what I liked was something too obscure, and no one would want to read it?
So, I sat down, in front of my Zenwriter, and thought to myself, what are some steps I can take to make this less terrifying. What are some things I can ask myself about writing in a niche, to find out what exactly my niche was. Now, I already had a niggling thought in the back of my head of what that might be, but I didn’t necessarily want to force myself into it.
The first question in my list was: What do I want to share with the world?
This was easy. I want to share fantasy with everyone. I want to share it in a way that makes everyone feel included. Women, men, transgender, genderqueer, gay, straight, bisexual, asexual, aromantic, everyone, everywhere should be able to read a fantasy book and think, “oh wow, I wish that I could experience that.”
The second question was: Okay, but what do you want to share with the world ON YOUR BLOG?
This wasn’t so easy. In fact, it’s what caused the several day panic attack. I want to share myself with the world. I want to let everyone know who I am and where I come from and why I’m the way I am. But I also want to share with the world the things that are wrong, and the things that are right and the things that are beautiful. I want to teach the world to accept not only itself but everyone else, and to see that we are all the same in that we dream beautiful dreams.
That lead to the question: But how can I share this with the world?
A friend of mine, Chris Votey, brought up the idea of interviews with other LGBTQA writers, Reviews of other writer’s work, and offering myself as a representative of Asexual culture. Which, honestly, I wouldn’t find too bad. It would take a lot of time, and energy however. But, I find the more I think about it, the less I mind. Because really, isn’t it about what I give, not what it takes from me? Then, I thought about what else I could do to share my dream of representation with the world.
Resources. I could provide resources for things that most people don’t think of. I could try to provide a unique look into certain subcultures. I could write about the things that interest me, and hopefully, provide enough information that others would like it. But that won’t get me any closer to being like those I admire. That won’t bring me the same sort of love that Misha Collins, Andrew Hussie, or Neil Gaiman have. That won’t help others to see my words.
Then, I thought that perhaps I could start with lists. With things that I find out, over the course of my journey to become a full-fledged author. Such as this list that you’re reading right now. That definitely helped to ease my panic a little. Because lists, lists are small, and easy, and quickly done, so I can definitely work with them. Another thing I could have tried is perhaps snippets of information found throughout the internet. Or perhaps little anecdotes from my life that help me to focus on what it is I am working on.
But that’s all very abstract and not very well thought out. So, I rewrote it.

 

1) What is it that I want to share with the world?
– Representation for all, and fantasy that everyone can enjoy.

2) What is it that I want to share with those reading my blog?
-Ways to spread Representation, My thoughts on LGBTQA representation, and my progress in my quest for more.

3) How am I to share this?
– Lists
– Personal anecdotes
– Resources found throughout my internet trawling
– Interviews with other LGBTQA writers
– Reviews of websites, blogs and books written for/by other LGBTQA writers
– Snippets of my writing and writing styles

And there you have it. My path to finding my niche, and settling into it. I hope this helps you, because it certainly helped me. If you need any more information, please, leave a comment, or email me, and I’ll be happy to help you find your niche too. And please, don’t hesitate to speak up.

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